I just started a new painting. This painting is for one of my best friends who happens to have a love of sunflowers. I hope that I can create this painting and it will be beautiful for her. But more than bringing beauty to her home, I want this painting to soothe her spirit. She is going through a rough time. Family member illness, a tough and ill-rewarding job, some health concerns of her own -- all raise my anxiety levels on her behalf. When my anxiety level goes up, so does my desire to paint.
I ask myself why I think this will make a difference for her and the answer is: I really believe that art can bring solace and peace. It can take you out of the moment you are in and bring you into another more still and precious state of mind. But while I am doing this painting for my friend, I am also doing it for me. Just thinking about suffering of any kind just drives my need to escape it and painting has become the way I escape. Does it do this for everyone? I think so. I don't know. Maybe. I guess I hope so. I hope everyone can be influenced to a more precious state of mind by a piece of art that triggers solace. Whether viewing or making it. It won't be the same image or style that touches everyone which is why I am very deliberately choosing what I think will bring my friend joy. At the same time, I can't paint something that won't also soothe my spirit. I guess in my heart, I hope that this painting will let my soul speak directly to hers. That all the worry, even if for a moment, can fall away. And that the moment repeats itself over and over whenever she sees it and somehow my soul knows that her soul rests. This may be too much to even hope for but the ripe, yellow warmth that is the sunflower's gift to late summer could just wash a little warmth over her spirit and mine. By listening to my soul speak I strive to bring something universal to each painting. I miss the mark a lot and this painting is still just a horizon on a canvas. Then again, my striving could be a salve to the savage worry that gnaws our hearts.
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When I was a kid I was obsessed with books and reading; I still am. If anyone asked me from the time I was about 8 until the time I was 28, what I wanted to be, the answer was "writer". I dreamed of writing a great Canadian novel. The kind of book passed between friends. A novel so good you wrote your name in the cover so you could be sure to get it back.
In high school I did some writing. I wrote some short stories that were published in the year book and one of them was published in a local Oxford county publication (#biggoalsat14). And then I dreamed bigger. I started a novel. About a million times. But I never finished anything. I went to university (not for English), graduated, started working, and I wrote less and less. I let life get in my way but in the back of my heart, I still called myself a writer. But I had a problem. Stephen King is an amazing and prolific writer and I will never forget this quote I read that was attributed to him: "If you want to be a writer you must do two things above all others: read a lot and write a lot." I was reading a lot but I wasn't writing at all. I failed myself, I let my dream die. In this blog I will talk more about dreams and how they thrive and how they die. I dream of this being a conversation among the as-yet imaginary people who will read my story. It might get messy. I believe in vulnerability - all the yucky uncomfortable pain and joy of it. Writing is an incredible art form, but that's not what this blog is about. This blog is about visual art and artists, makers and creators that work with their hands, their materials and their minds. The name of this website is inspired by Stephen King's advice. If you want to be an artist, you must do 1 thing above all others: Make Art. Because Artists Make Art. I hope you can join me on my journey of making art and being an artist. --Cheers, Andrea-- |
ABOUT {ME}Artist. Creator. Writer. Thinker. Compelled to always get better. Archives
December 2019
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